Stockholm Syndrome at Work: Psychologically Shackled to a Brand?
A while back, I worked with someone genuinely extraordinary—a colleague whose talent, industry knowledge, and work ethic were undeniable. She was the type of team member who lit up a room with her bright energy, ideas and humor. She had a natural way with people and seemed poised for big things at this huge brand.
Yet, despite much admiration from her project teams, her home department seemed to continually overlook her. She constantly balanced an unmanageable workload, her contributions seemed undervalued, and the recognition I felt she deserved was nowhere in sight.
What made this especially heartbreaking to witness was that she had dreamed of working for this company since she was a teen. Its powerful brand messaging and the allure of being part of something so iconic had drawn her in. And maybe it's also what's holding her there—trapped, in a way.
Years later, she remains with the brand. Perhaps it's because she's found new opportunities, beyond her old role, but I've sometimes wondered if there's something more to her staying. A kind of invisible handcuff she and others can't quite shake.
I've witnessed this phenomenon at a few other big brands I have worked for and, years later, found myself in a similar place. Which led me to dig into why I was feeling so captive.
Recognizing The Signs
Have you ever wondered why we stick with jobs or companies that make us feel trapped or undervalued? I sometimes wonder if a subtle form of Stockholm Syndrome might be at play in our workplaces—especially at renowned brands.
We typically associate abusive relationships with personal connections—partners, family members, or friends—but similar dynamics can exist in our professional lives. Abuse in a relationship, after all, isn't limited to physical or emotional harm. It can also be a feeling of being disrespected, under-appreciated, or simply being in a toxic environment. Yet many of us stay. Why?
Psychologists explain that in abusive relationships, victims often stay due to a complex mix of fear, dependence, and some distorted sense of loyalty or hope. In many cases, the idea of leaving feels practically impossible, either because of financial constraints, fear of the unknown — or a belief that things might eventually improve. For me, this last explanation resembles what people experience when caught in Stockholm Syndrome, where hostages develop psychological bonds with their captors and can even begin to defend them.
Stockholm Syndrome is a coping mechanism where people develop empathy—even affection—for their captors, despite the harm. It's a bizarre paradox—how can a victim begin to care for their abuser? It's a survival response to distress, one that may seem strange but helps them cope. Can this same phenomenon be happening at work? Could we, in some way, be held captive by the brands we support out of a distorted sense of loyalty — or hope?
As I explored this concept online, I found I wasn’t alone in my thinking. George Kohlrieser, writing in I Magazine (published by the Institute for Management Development), explains, “In organizations, this syndrome occurs when there is a lack of psychological safety to speak up,” often due to a lack of diversity on teams. In Psychology Today, James Ullrich describes how organizations can use “company culture” to cultivate loyalty. As he puts it, management prioritizes shaping a strong loyalty to the company, but this loyalty doesn’t always extend to caring for employees’ emotional well-being.
Why We Stay
Our work is more than just something we do. It's a relationship of sorts. We form connections with our employers, colleagues, and the brand itself, including its values and propagated culture, sometimes even feeling a sense of duty or guilt for wanting to leave — even when things aren't great.
If we were experiencing abuse in a personal relationship, we'd hopefully seek a way out. So why don't we do the same when it comes to work?
One reason could be that workplace captivity can take many forms: being micromanaged, excluded from key decisions and conversations, or even enduring subtle gaslighting that makes us doubt our skills. Unlike in personal relationships, though, where there's a clearer cultural understanding of when something is unhealthy, we're conditioned to endure hardship in the workplace as part of the deal. It is "work," after all.
My sense is that brand loyalty compounds this dilemma. The attachment can feel even stronger with big, well-known or "hot" companies. There's an emotional grip, a sense that leaving a "great" company would somehow be a massive personal failure. We may feel immense guilt at the thought of walking away from a "prestigious" company that others may envy us for being part of.
Reevaluating Your Relationship With A Brand
So, how do we remove the rose-colored glasses and begin to see this relationship for what it is?
Recognizing a toxic relationship with work, especially when a beloved brand is involved, can be tricky, but here are some considerations I've explored to help me raise my awareness that I recommend:
Reflect on Personal Focus: When you talk about your job with others, is there more focus on the brand's image than how it feels to work there? Considering this can help clarify your subconscious feelings about work.
Conduct Emotional Check-ins: Take stock of how you feel, especially about the brand. Do you feel anxious or unfulfilled but convince yourself that working for this "dream company" makes it worth it?
Compare Brand Values to Your Core Values: A brand's values are not its culture—they're its ambition. The values a brand may sell are likely aspirational, yet how well do they align with your actual day-to-day experience? Perhaps the brand claims to stand for great leadership—something you value deeply—yet you're enduring the worst of your career. Do you notice yourself rationalizing company decisions that contradict your values or principles? These may be signs of a disconnect between values and reality and how it impacts what's most important to you.
Evaluate Professional Growth: Have you felt stuck or under-appreciated but continue to justify staying by telling yourself it's a "top" brand? That things will get better once this massive growth phase ebbs? Are you staying because of meaningful work and progress? Brand prestige shouldn't override one's need for professional growth and fulfillment.
Assess Workplace Dynamics: Are you staying because your contributions are respected and valued by those you work with? Acknowledge if the company's status makes you overlook poor treatment from management, colleagues, or your leader.
Examine Organizational Diversity: Is the brand really living up to the image it's selling? Perhaps HR boasts of hiring a diverse workforce, yet your department leadership is ironically homogenous: the same gender with similar age, ethnicity, brand tenure, and work experience. Does your department encourage diversity of thought and civil disagreement? Is there silence when your department head solicits candid feedback from the group? This could be a sign of a lack of psychological safety and groupthink.
There are undoubtedly many amazing benefits that can come from being part of a popular brand. Yet when we sense our loyalty has begun to outweigh our well-being, it may be time to reassess. Awareness is the first step toward breaking free. By setting new boundaries and building confidence, we can seek (or create) environments that truly value us. After all, work should add to our lives — not hold us captive. Embracing this awareness is the beginning of a renewed commitment to our personal growth and happiness.
